


every pebble

by captainofthegreenpeas



Category: Hunger Games Series - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, F/F, Femslash, Hair Brushing, Masoncoin, Reconciliation, References to Torture, Romance, mild bad language, vengeance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-01
Updated: 2018-03-01
Packaged: 2019-03-25 17:47:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,038
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13839870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/captainofthegreenpeas/pseuds/captainofthegreenpeas
Summary: Johanna brushes out Alma's hair for her, and Alma swears to avenge every wrong the Capitol has inflicted upon Johanna.





	every pebble

The brush rolled through the cloak of grey, softening and springing out the silk of it. The extending of the strands tugged at Alma’s eyelids. She yielded to the urge to close them. She had never thought that something as simple as Johanna brushing out her hair could be such an intimate act. That’s what happens when you’re silly with love, she guessed. Everything they do becomes important. Even such everyday things as stretching fingers or closing doors felt so personal, so exposed.

  
Johanna was taking her sweet time about it, sliding her hand down each lock, as if to become personally acquainted with it. 

  
“What is it about my hair that you love so much?”

  
“The fact that you have any, for a start.” Johanna’s tone with anyone else would have been caustic, but for Alma it was almost gentle.

  
“Ah,” a frown crossed Alma’s face, a rare occurrence in Johanna’s company. “I’m sorry.”

  
“What for? It’s just hair.”

  
“It was a part of you. They took it away.”

  
“Doesn’t matter.” Johanna’s hands stilled. “Didn’t hurt at all when I lost my hair. When I lost my fingernails, however…” Alma quickly reached for her hands and held them in her own, as if trying to soothe them with her touch.

  
“Don’t defeat Snow too quickly now,” Johanna tried to make light of it. “I wanna have a bitchin’ hairdo by the time he goes. It can be the last thing he sees before he dies.”

  
_A mane for my little lion_ , Alma thought. But even that did not bring a smile back to her.

  
“I need to tell you-” She should have said it before, but uncharacteristically of her she had delayed it as long as possible. That was foolish. It would have hurt them both much less if Alma had said at the start, at the moment they met-

  
“I didn’t- I am not your rescuer.”

  
“What do you mean? Was that hovercraft just passing by and "accidentally” busted me and Peeta out?“

  
"It was not my original intention to save you. Heavensbee removed Katniss from the arena first, then Beetee, then Finnick. He left you with Peeta. I told him he should have rescued Peeta instead. I stand by that, at least. But I did not protest about your abandonment in there.”

  
There was a silence. Alma expected Johanna to yank her hands away, but she did not.

  
“If you are angry, do not conceal it.”

  
“Why would I be angry? You didn’t know me. I didn’t know you. Plutarch did know me; and he didn’t think twice about leaving me to die. Yet you’re the one apologising for it.”

  
“But- I had you broken out for Katniss. She vouched for you and insisted that you be freed and pardoned at the earliest opportunity. Had she not made you a priority- you’d be tried for crimes against humanity.”

  
“A fair trial?”

  
“Why not fair?”

  
Johanna swallowed. Slowly, she slid her hands from Alma’s grip and sat on the side of the bed.

  
“When the forcefield blew out and the whole arena went haywire, I thought I was about to die. Then the Capitol hovercraft showed up and I wished that I was. All I thought about was the when and how. Would I be tortured to exhaustion, mutilated through experiments or publicly executed? Why not all three? I never heard anything beyond the screaming and the questioners. I had no idea who was still alive, except for Peeta.

  
"Someone picked me up at last and carried me to the hovercraft and I thought that meant I was physically dead now, that they were flying me to Seven to bury me. The idea that someone- anyone, had come to rescue me never crossed my mind,”

  
A grin cracked Johanna’s face. “After all that, maybe I wouldn’t grumble too much at a trial. Fair or not.”  It faded at the look on Alma’s face.

“Alma. You can’t save everyone.”

  
“I know that.” Alma replied quickly. “I always have.” _Nell. Septimus._ “If my daughter was still alive, she’d be your age now.”

  
“Really? I’m older than I look.”

  
“So was she. She had something of your spirit, too. I knew she was scared, in her final hours, who would not be? But she hid it for me.” Alma wiped her eyes with the back of her hand. “Don’t ever hide anything from me, even if you’re trying to make things better. I can take a lot, now. I promise not to hide anything from you, either.”

  
Johanna crossed the room to kneel at Alma’s feet, taking her hands up again. “I didn’t know what you said, about the rescue. But it’s what I would have guessed. I don’t care what you did or didn’t do. I love you so much I trust you’ve always done what you had to, done what was needed. I don’t care what anyone says about you-”

  
“What do they say about me?”

  
“I don’t know. But whatever they say about us, about you and me, I don’t care. They can call me crazy. They’re right. I’m too busy looking at you to notice them. Too busy caring about your happiness to give a damn what they think.”

  
Alma leaned over and folded slim arms around Johanna, holding her close. Sparse tears slipped out onto Alma’s sleeve.

  
“I’ll kill them,” she found herself promising Johanna. “Every last one of them, for everything. They will know, how it feels, to lose the ones you love. I will crush every stone in the Capitol, every pebble, every pane of glass into dust. Bury what was high and uproot everything that was buried.”

  
A smile dug into Alma’s shoulder.

“Meanwhile, I’ll grow my hair back.” Johanna sighed. “I’d help out with the burying but there’s no way a doctor’s going to send me into combat. I’ll try and do the training, but without some miracle I’m going to have to stay behind the lines.”

  
Alma didn’t say it, but she was secretly glad. She had no intention of risking Johanna with so much as another papercut.

  
“You can train,” she gave Johanna a peck on the cheek. “But make sure you leave plenty of time for me.”


End file.
